queen of connection | Shelby L. Phillips

Easy Ways To Praise Your Child

January 13, 2013 at 10:56 pm 1 comment

It felt like a very long holiday break at my house. At one point I thought my girls would never stop fighting. They fought with each other, the neighbors, me. Very few moments of love, peace and joy. If I heard “it’s not fair” one more time, I thought I was going to drop kick someone. (Again, no love, peace and joy there!) Of course, as their levels grew, so did mine. By the end of vacation I was beginning to wonder if they’d make it to puberty.

Then I read something that changed everything. I happened upon a list of Ways to Praise Your Child that I received from my daughter’s 3rd grade teacher. I’m always looking for good words and phrases to use, let’s face it, you can only say “nice effort” so many times, and my girls have out grown every standard line I have in my arsenal. So eager to learn I read:

Wow * Way To Go * Super * You’re Special * Outstanding * Excellent * Great * Good * Neat * Well Done * Remarkable * I Knew You Could Do It * I’m Proud Of You * Fantastic * Super Job * Nice Work * Looking Good * Beautiful * You’re On Top Of It * Now You’re Flying * You’re Catching On * Now You’ve Got It * Incredible Thinking * Bravo * You’re Fantastic * Hurray For You * You’re On Track * You’re On Your Way * How Nice * How Clever * Good Job * Nothing Can Stop You Now * Good For You * You’re A Winner * Remarkable Thinking * Remarkable Work * Spectacular * Great Discovery * Fabulous Connection * You Figured It Out * Way To Show Good Judgement * Bingo * Magnificent * Marvelous * Terrific * You’re Important * Phenomenal * That’s Sensational * Super Work * Creative Thinking * You’re A Real Trooper * You’re So Responsible * What An Imagination * Keep Trying * What A Good Listener * You Made That Fun * You’re Growing Up * You Tried Your Best * It Shows You Care * Nice Sharing * Outstanding Thinking * You’re Such a Good Friend * I Believe In You * I Trust You * Your Opinion Matters * I’m Listening * You Mean A Lot To Me * You Make Me So Happy * You Make Me Laugh * You Brighten My Day * You Make My Heart Sing * I Respect You * That’s Correct * You’re A Joy * You’re A Treasure * You’re A Winner * You Made My Day * That’s The Best * You’re The Greatest * You Deserve A Hug * You Deserve A Kiss * I Love You

I realized while reading this list that I wasn’t seeing Spirit in my girls. I had forgotten how to see their magnificence. Instead I was solely focused on what needed to be fixed in them, or better yet, what my interpretation was of what needed to be fixed. I had forgotten to light up when they walked in the room, remembering that they are truly gifts to the world…like we all are.

I have put this small shift into place this week and boy what a difference it made! I’m convinced!  I’d rather live in a house where I’m loved and adored for who I am, rather than one where I am judged and constantly improved upon too, even if it was for my own good.

So my New Year’s resolution for 2013?  Remember to find G-d in my beautiful children.

Happy New Year!

Entry filed under: Connection, Parenting, Relationships. Tags: child, Children, Praise.